i'm a girl and i have a penis. this is my dick...
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
DSCI1047
 
 
DSCI1048

DSCI1049


 

whahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!!

did i get you guys?????

this is an ashtray shaped like a dick. a birthday present from my classmate.

dont get mad!!!!

april fool's day!!!

 

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Comments

  • mommyof2 said Apr 1, 2007...
    Damn!!! I bet you tried to sit on it!!!
  • CamDaMan20 said Apr 1, 2007...
    Actually its kinda small for sex wouldn't ya think ?  But wood does swell once it gets wet....hehe
  • wombat said Apr 1, 2007...
    SMOKIN'!   Yea--you got me!  Didn't see the photos at first.  Funny girl!
  • MissMimi said Apr 1, 2007...
    You little minx! you got me! I was all worried that you had posted pictures of...well, I'm relieved you didn't. LOL queenie--good one!
  • CamDaMan20 said Apr 1, 2007...
    At least that ashtray should not slip out of your hand.....lol
  • billmac said Apr 1, 2007...
    Well maby you can ued it on your self and get off on it when you are not useing as a ash tray LOL LOL You got me too! 
  • evillinclinations said Apr 1, 2007...
    Nice ashtray!
  • dailyachesandpains said Apr 1, 2007...
    Well, make sure you keep it an ashtray!  LOL!
  • fatesblade said Apr 1, 2007...
    that's fucken hot
  • b.obbylisiouze said Apr 1, 2007...
    wow.  u totally got me man. i was like. NO WAY MAN!. haha. that was good.
  • skald said Apr 1, 2007...
    You naughty girl ha aha he he 
  • ALIENated said Apr 1, 2007...
    How does it look when you suck on it?
  • angeliaparish said Apr 1, 2007...
    but i was all ready to respond with opinions about ambiguous genitalia! guess i'll have to save it for another time.that was a good one!
  • silverwhisper said Apr 1, 2007...
    bwa-ha-ha-ha-ha! that was hysterical! ed
  • missunderstood1162 said Apr 1, 2007...
    hahahah you are a naughty girl...LOL.  funny business!
  • rebelyell said Apr 1, 2007...
    wow you had me going big time, all ready for some freakshow confession like Jerry Springer or something, cool!!
  • mom said Apr 1, 2007...
    Queen-do you use that for cigarettes or do you ride that?  Inquiring minds want to know. Not very often you get to see a 2 toned penis. Can I have that when you die?
  • TheLiz said Apr 1, 2007...
    Nicer than most I've seen. Where do you think I could find one of those? jk. :-)
  • Ormocanon said Apr 1, 2007...
    qp, isa lang ang tanong ko: katabi mo ba yan sa pagtulog? :)
  • biglove said Apr 1, 2007...
    I love it....how fabulous!!!! hehehe ;)))
  • Lioness said Apr 1, 2007...
    naughty, naughty queen.... thanks for a good laugh! =)
  • MsBradford07 said Apr 1, 2007...
    That is a nice ashtray, queen.
  • mom said Apr 1, 2007...
    Queen- I hope I don't have nightmares about this.
  • queenparanoia said Apr 1, 2007...
    whahahahahahaahhahahahaha   i fooled everyone!!!!!!!   wombat: ty wombie!!! hehehehe   missmimi: how are you my missmimi? its nice i made i you laugh!!!   camdaman20: hehehehe agreed!!!   fatesblade: glad you liked it =)   b.obbylisiouze: heheheyeah i got you thanks!!!   skald: hehehehehhe yeah i am =)   alienated: i'm sorry i cant suck it. its too big for my mouth. =)   angeliaparish: hehehehehe i got you!!   ed: glad you like it!! =)   missunderstood: hehehehehe glad you like it! miss you girl!!! rebelyell: really? me on springer? that would be funny!!!   mom: i use it for cigarettes! sorry i cant sit on it its too hard! and too big LOL =) yes you could have it someday!!!   TheLiz: i live in the philippines and you could get tis on souveniers section. =)   ormocanon: opo kuya! minsan. para mapanaginipan ko po!   xerendipity: i'll check the website later! =)    
  • petitepapillon said Apr 1, 2007...
    Lol, queen.
  • mom said Apr 1, 2007...
    Queen- you are my hero.  Woohoo!
  • queenparanoia said Apr 1, 2007...
    petitepapillon: glad you liked it! =)
  • queenparanoia said Apr 1, 2007...
    mom: salamat =)
  • mom said Apr 2, 2007...
    salamat?  ok what does it mean? Does it mean "Thank you"?  or "shut the fuck up"?
  • petitepapillon said Apr 2, 2007...
    Mom~ "Salamat" means "thank you" in tagalog. : )
  • Siong77 said Apr 2, 2007...
    That's a nice headline. Imagine that....
  • mom said Apr 2, 2007...
    awesome I have to write that one down too. :)
  • CayenneMan said Apr 2, 2007...
    I'm a man and I have a penis but my classmates never gave me anything kinky.I feel like I got ripped...
  • redrocks said Apr 2, 2007...
    LMAO!!!!!
  • queenparanoia said Apr 2, 2007...
    ehehehehehe i fooled everyone!!!   mom salamat means thank you!
  • botoni said Apr 2, 2007...
    Got me too queen!.....I hope you remembered to say Salamat to the friend who started this!...........
  • MissMimi said Apr 2, 2007...
    Mom send it to me after queenie sends it to you, and you're finished with it, okay? It would look nice on my piano.
  • mom said Apr 2, 2007...
    MIMI-  well ok, after  am done there might be ridges in the wood, ya know from me doing my Kegels and all.  But Yeah I will send it to you.
  • queenparanoia said Apr 2, 2007...
    ahahahahhahaha you guys want to use it??   honestly i dont use it. its too big and too hard.   but i would lend it to you guys =)
  • mom said Apr 2, 2007...
    I want it big and hard, always!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  I like the way it has an ashtray at the end.  A great way to keep it from getting all the way sucked up inside. Like a dildo stopper.
  • queenparanoia said Apr 2, 2007...
    ahahahahahahhahaha are you sure it will fit you mom??? it is way too big for me!!!
  • mom said Apr 2, 2007...
    LOL, there is a saying,"where there is a willy, there is a way.  I will make it fit!!!!!!!!!!
  • queenparanoia said Apr 3, 2007...
    ahahahhahahahaha do you smoke too? it comes handy being an ashtray.
  • TheNakedProfessor said Apr 7, 2007...
    Why is it so small?
  • queenparanoia said Apr 8, 2007...
    hehehehe thenaked professor it is actually very big.. ;)   or are you saying yours is bigger? LOL!!!
  • TheNakedProfessor said Apr 9, 2007...
    heh heh
  • CamDaMan20 said Apr 15, 2007...
    It is small...I can say that as a matter of fact...less than 7 ".I say this because the average ceramic tile is but 3 1/2 ".  When you look at the pics above, you will see, if you don't include the ashtray portion, the dic is less than 7" and hell yes, that is small.Cam.
  • queenparanoia said Apr 16, 2007...
    well i'll measure it next time for you! =)
  • TheNakedProfessor said Apr 16, 2007...
    Do you measure on top, on the bottom, or the side? Or all three, then give an average?
  • botoni said Apr 16, 2007...
    Along the top is the correct measure....on that one be sure to follow the curve. Girth is distance around at the thickest spot. Now where the hell is that micrometer and I ll measure myself for you queen.
  • queenparanoia said Apr 17, 2007...
    ehehehehehehehe i'll do that if i have time!!!!!!!!!
  • TheNakedProfessor said Apr 17, 2007...
    Can you calculate the measurements from pics?
  • CamDaMan20 said Apr 17, 2007...
    You can arrive at almost an acceptable conclusion of an items size went it sits within a back ground of objects inwhich to compare it to........damn, though you a tab bit smarter than to ask such an ignorant question. Caam
  • TheNakedProfessor said Apr 17, 2007...
    That wasn't the point, moron.
  • queenparanoia said Apr 18, 2007...
    hey hey hey no fighting on my post!!!!   stop fighting over my dick!!! =)
  • queenparanoia said Apr 19, 2007...
    ehehhehehehehehehehe i guess they want to have one too!!! joke !!! =)
  • TheNakedProfessor said Apr 20, 2007...
    Too many dicks in the house.
  • wombat said Apr 20, 2007...
    and 798 people wanting to see one on a girl........Ha!
  • queenparanoia said Apr 21, 2007...
    ahahahahahaha its 812 now!!!! wombie, people love my dick!!!!!!!!
  • PAPERBACKWRITER said Apr 22, 2007...
    You are crazieeeeeeeeeeeee bruha!;  )will be smiling all day = )ate
  • lrspeaks said Apr 22, 2007...
    I'm glad i recently spotted this site when i was looking to blog (again) because the people in this one is not afraid to open up and share their likes and dislikes. The right title gets a million hits everytime, even if the content is a little funny or desperate sometimes. LOL
  • queenparanoia said Apr 23, 2007...
    paper: woohooo!!!!!!!!! yeah pregnant women rocks!!!!! teka sinisipa ka na ba ng baby mo??? lrspeaks: lol. hehehehhehe i got you on this one right??
  • PAPERBACKWRITER said Apr 23, 2007...
    LOLnot yet sweetie. . .the baby is only 10 weeks old so, it is like the size of a rice corn (maybe a bit bigger! i gave away all my books about pregnancy, rofl)!muaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhate
  • botoni said Apr 23, 2007...
    I m getting concerned Queen! You re penis is getting way more attention than mine ever did!......hehehehe
  • queenparanoia said Apr 24, 2007...
    botoni: ehehehehehehe yeah wait till my next picture of my penis!!!
  • kruuyai said Apr 26, 2007...
    Yup, queensie, it's all in the marketing!  :)
  • queenparanoia said Apr 26, 2007...
    hehehehehe i agree kruu!!!
  • queenparanoia said Apr 27, 2007...
    janaethan: talaga??? hehehhehe baka mamya eh yun na ang katabi nun pagmatulog at hindi na ikaw! joke lang po!!!
  • janaethan said Apr 27, 2007...
    ha - ha !!! I actually have the same ashtray (which we brought home from a vacation in Baguio) which i am hiding now under our bed. I don't want my wife to see it again. I hate comparisons......
  • botoni said Apr 27, 2007...
    Good grief queen.....You ve almost got a thousand hits on your penis post! I wish my penis were just one tenth as popular as yours!.....hehehe
  • queenparanoia said Apr 28, 2007...
    botoni... well nothing beats the real thing so dont sweat it out!!! happy birthday!!!
  • botoni said Apr 28, 2007...
    Lol....thanks queen....Who ratted about my birthday?....hehehehe
  • queenparanoia said Apr 28, 2007...
    it was missmimi!!! =) how old are you by the way??
  • botoni said Apr 28, 2007...
    one hundred and sixty three
  • queenparanoia said Apr 28, 2007...
    LOL!!! and still kicking it!!!
  • CamDaMan20 said May 6, 2007...
    Honest, I really thought...." i have swallowed a penis.....i think i;m a girl".....was TNP sharing w/ the community once again, just a sharing person...just share, share and share....excuse me..my errorCam : - )  .....stay happppyyy.
  • queenparanoia said May 6, 2007...
    camdaman:whahahahahahaha LOL!!! swallowing a penis!!!! whahahaha that's hilarious!!!!
  • TheNakedProfessor said May 25, 2007...
    Heh. My penis is beating your penis. Largely thanks to you!! LOL
  • queenparanoia said May 25, 2007...
    ohmygod really??? well hehehhehe i like your's better =)
  • SecretFetish said Jun 10, 2007...
    haha, That was great!!! 
  • queenparanoia said Jun 11, 2007...
    thank you secretfetish... cool username!!!
  • JadeLondon said Jun 13, 2007...
    Queenie: You crack me up, girlie! :) Oh, and question: 'salamat' means 'thank you'--so, what does 'shut the fuck up' mean? Just curious, especially since it was mentioned.
  • queenparanoia said Jun 14, 2007...
    heheheheh hello jade! hmmm. shut the fuck up? its very hard to translate maybe you should ask other pinoy soulcasters! since it's an expression its hard for me to translate it..
  • JadeLondon said Jun 14, 2007...
    Queenie: I understand. I once had a co-worker who spoke five languages. She loved to pick my brain for different expressions. She was amused at my use of 'bread and butter' to mean 'paycheck'. As in: This job is my bread and butter.
  • queenparanoia said Jun 23, 2007...
    really? well what if she's cursing you in another language???
  • TheNakedProfessor said Jul 16, 2007...
      Okay queenie, my penis may be about 900 hits ahead of your penis, but look what it took! Not only my penis but my you-know-what plus a bunch of lusty women in various stages of nudity and lewdity. All you have to work with is an ashtray and an ass-kicking title. That title is a classic.   Besides, I know that those 900 hits are all you!!!!!   How's the record holding????  
  • CamDaMan20 said Jul 16, 2007...
    a record ? some last a lifetime.
  • TheNakedProfessor said Jul 16, 2007...
      ...oh yes, I forgot to give credit to my self-appointed publicist, Cam... ...without whom I never could have beaten your penis!!    
  • queenparanoia said Jul 17, 2007...
    hahahahha youre right!!! i keep coming back on your post!!! hmm.... i'f i'm not busy i'll dedicate a naughty one for you!!! =)
  • TheNakedProfessor said Jul 31, 2007...
      ....queenie, I just wondered about something. Now tell me the truth. Where exactly has that ashtray been??? Remember what Bill Clinton did with his cigars?!!!    
  • queenparanoia said Aug 1, 2007...
    hehehehe the queen never tells her secret... =)
  • sharonjasmine said Aug 21, 2007...
    Just checking to see how your penis is doing. Not bad.
  • queenparanoia said Aug 22, 2007...
    thank you sharonjasmine... =)
  • queenparanoia said Oct 14, 2007...
    thanks coollinux... =)
  • TheNakedProfessor said Oct 15, 2007...
      You were my number 300, so now I'm your number 100.   Can you believe these hits on our penuses?   I'm up to 12,300 and something!!!!   Dick On!    
  • queenparanoia said Oct 15, 2007...
    really? oh wow TnP!!! =)
  • hotaka said Nov 17, 2007...
    Yes, this was the first photo I ever saw of you.
  • queenparanoia said Nov 17, 2007...
    hotaka: hehehehe i'm holding my ashtray... =) glad you remembered it!!! =)
  • Fallyn said Nov 27, 2007...
    it's beautiful queen.
  • queenparanoia said Nov 27, 2007...
    fallyn: yes indeed it is so beautiful... =)
  • TheNakedProfessor said Nov 30, 2007...
    And just WHERE are you holding it? ;)  
  • queenparanoia said Nov 30, 2007...
    TnP: hello!!!!!! i miss you!!! where the hell have you been???? i want more pics!!!!
  • phoeby said Apr 1, 2008...
    *lmao*i remember this one!
  • queenparanoia said Apr 1, 2008...
    phoeby: hehehehe very funny right?!?!??!?! =)
  • fallenangel12 said Apr 1, 2008...
    I have one just like it, well actually I had 3, in different sizes. Hahah...I gave the other 2 away coz people might think im a pervert when they go to my place and see all 3 of them. Reminds me of Baguio and how I long to go there to escape this heat!!! God help us.
  • queenparanoia said Apr 1, 2008...
    fallenangel: heheheh yup it's very famous in bagiou but my friend bought it in iloilo... =) grabe 3???? hehehhehehehehe idol!!!! =)   crybabylu: happy april fool's day!!!! =)
  • 007Hardone said Jul 31, 2008...
    Holy Smoke, Is that a Big One! Think of all the things to be done with it,,,, besides and ,,,, well oh no,,,, keep with the original thought here,,,,,,
  • queenparanoia said Aug 1, 2008...
    hardone: lol... ;-)
  • 007Hardone said Aug 1, 2008...
    MMMmmm,,, there's kinda a story behind my ID, a few years ago a problem developed and the solution was my very own implant. It has become common for some ladies to have breast implants, tummy tucks, derrier mods. I accepted my fate and had my own implant. It was not for a medical neccessity not vanity.   The penis in the pic tho is a beaut tho, well crafted hardwood, finished to a very high degree,,,,, 
  • queenparanoia said Aug 2, 2008...
    oh youre a girl! i thought you were a guy... dont worry i have nothing against implants just as long as it looks okay... ;-)
  • TheNakedProfessor said Aug 2, 2008...
      How's SoulCast's 2nd most popular penis doing these days, queenie? Heh heh.  
  • 007Hardone said Aug 2, 2008...
    My "Woodie" has been outdone by a piece of "Wood!" God I'm jealous now,,,,,
  • queenparanoia said Aug 2, 2008...
    TnP: still horny... ;-)  
  • one_wired_kitty said Aug 10, 2008...
    LOL ... awesome
  • queenparanoia said Aug 10, 2008...
    onewirekitty: thanks... ;-)
  • one_wired_kitty said Aug 13, 2008...
    yw ....
  • MidniteToker said Oct 30, 2008...
    This post is genius...everyone that clicked on it had, (in a split second) hoped to see some fucked up tranny picture! and then...right at the moment of liberation, everyone felt a slight sting of disappointment that their opportunity to *accidentally happen* upon a disturbingly interesting picture (buried within their blogsite) had passed them by. let's all go surfing on some bizarro internet porn waves!
  • queenparanoia said Oct 31, 2008...
    midnite: hehehehe thank you. and i dont think this is porn...
  • pleasantskies said Feb 18, 2009...
    Lol.
  • pleasantskies said Feb 18, 2009...
  • wombat said Feb 18, 2009...
    15,461 views? Must be a record!
  • queenparanoia said Feb 19, 2009...
    i cant believe this post is still famous... whaahhahahahhahahha (my evli laugh!)
  • TheNakedProfessor said Feb 26, 2009...
    I have a girl...and I'm a penis.
  • queenparanoia said Mar 1, 2009...
    thenakedproffessor: and what a penis it is!!! lol... please post more pics!!!
  • vete said Jun 18, 2009...
    Yea! U also got me lmao!! Dat funy!
  • queenparanoia said Jun 18, 2009...
    vete: glad you like it... ;-)

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